OLDER & WISER PART 1.

1. www.browncardigan.com is one of the most fucked up and yet funny as shit websites i have seen in a long time.

2. Sometimes no matter how hard you try to convince others that they are wrong, you will never succeed. Because quite a few people choose to live in their own little worlds and feel shit scared to step outside of their bubble for even a moment.

3. I am not half of a person. I am not part of someone else, I never will be.

4. Huge ornate engagement rings are fucking tacky.

5. Spam is annoying.

6. When you support others, the support you gave will eventually come back to you- but maybe not from the source.

7. I cant take hearing about Illuminati or 2012 anymore. I swear to god or to the mayans (you know- whoever is cool to believe in THIS WEEK) that I will probably go on a world rampage out of frustration from ignorance and the sheer gullibility of some of the people who surround me. IF WE KNOW ABOUT IT, IT IS NOT LEGITIMATE. WE THINK WE KNOW MORE THAN WE ACTUALLY DO. WE DONT KNOW SHIT ABOUT SHIT, JUST LIVE FOR TODAY!

8. Nothing that is good for you ever comes easy. And why would you want it to? Hard work makes the weekend that much sweeter.

9. Fame has become a blurred line where talent, humour and artistry has taken a backseat to the people who have become famous (or infamous) for nothing. Kardashians Im talking about you. And your friends. What was once reserved for the creative elite has now become something of a public pool with a dirty condom floating in it.

10. RIP Elizabeth Taylor. In referring to item 9, you were one of the last to circulate in that creative elite. And it disturbed me yesterday when a bunch of wide mouthed, closed eyed fuckwits got you mixed up for Liza Minelli in a shrill and extremely annoying tone in class at University. I mean COME...ON....you have to be at least 18...meaning you were born in 1992- and you are studying communications- which includes media analysing- what the fuck?! WATCH SOMETHING OTHER THAN THE BIGGEST FUCKING LOSER FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE! (or Cabaret as it seemed to be)

11. When you continually talk about how many homosexual men are going to hit on you at an event such as Mardi Gras- it shows girls just how full of yourself you actually are. What you have hidden and disguised as humility and grace for years comes out in a slur of self importance and delusion. But yeah, you are so going to get harassed tonight babe.

12. Splendour in the Grass is actually the New years of mine and my friends year. Our year begins on the 29th of July this year.

13. If you are single, you should fuck around just to get a feel of who you are by way of interacting with people you dont know. And I dont just mean fuck around sexually (although I do recommend it - with protection), but fuck around with people you dont know. See how they react to you and if they dont like you- then FUCK THEM! To Be Continued....

14. Speaking of fucking "them"- never compromise who you are or what you believe in due to someone else's opinion. The comment thats spends 3.5 seconds on their lips and minds- but may stay on yours for weeks isnt worth the rancid spit they used to propel the insult forward.

15. Buy a T shirt from your band's concert and be proud of it.

16. Caffeine after 4pm is fucked.

17. You have to be really drunk/ off your nut to go to the beery nowadays. I dont know what has changed or why- but I went there the other week just a little bit off drunk and ended up leaving wondering why I always have Fatman Scoop in my head for the rest of the night after coming to terms with being ignored by people who are on your Facebook and will look at you directly in the eye, but will not raise their arm in a "hello" motion if their life depended on it.

18. People are not "shy", they are "deadshits".

19. Cooking is a form of therapy, and so is walking. (and it seems you need both to fit into that body con GUUURRRRLLLL)

20. People do not leave you, they just move on with themselves.